Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
