Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Randomize
