and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Randomize
