Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize
