We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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