i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Randomize
