oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
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