I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
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