he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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