She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
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