I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Randomize
