I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
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