Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
she peed on how many people?
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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