Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
last night I used snow as a chaser
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
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