They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
