apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
There r osticjed everywhere
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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