scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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