Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
