I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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