Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Randomize
