absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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