i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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