ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
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