his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
nutella sex= disaster
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
