I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
Randomize
