i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
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