If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Randomize
