yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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