All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Randomize
