Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
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