Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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