I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
