Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
I have post one night stand depression
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
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