I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Randomize
