i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
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