Barsexuality is the new black.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
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