Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
he had hair everywhere except his balls
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
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