i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
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