Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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