Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Randomize
