Kareoke will never be a sober sport
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Found your dick twin last night
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
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