I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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