I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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