you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
