don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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