Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Randomize
