I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
