We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
