Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
just tell him i said nine months
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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