where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Just cropdusted the office
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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